5 Thanksgiving Tension Taming Tips

The Thanksgiving feast: It's more of an ordeal than a celebration in some families. Ugly family tensions rearing their heads like clockwork each year. Maybe you have a self-appointed family dictator like Marney of the hilarious "Thanksgiving Letter" fame who sucks the fun out of every get-together?

If you're dreading another unpleasant Thanksgiving dinner, why not try some of the following tension taming tips. Who knows? Perhaps you'll become the family peacemaker this year!

1. Have a seating plan. The atmosphere will be oh-so-much improved if you can match like-minded family members at the table. Here's how to do it without sounding like a bossy boots: have the kids make and decorate cute place name cards. If you emphasize it was the kids' contribution to the big day, you'll boost the odds that everyone will obediently sit where you would like.

2. Stagger arrival times. Not everyone wants to spend an entire day with their extended family. Respect that. If you're hosting, let your less-sociable relatives know it's perfectly fine to turn up closer to the hour that dinner is served if they'd prefer not to spend the entire day or afternoon together.

3. Introduce a movie tradition. Pop in a dvd -- a movie that's upbeat and Thanksgiving-related. At best, it'll make everyone more agreeable. At the very least, it'll provide a welcome distraction for kids and those adults who need a moment away from small talk. Just don't let the movie take center stage for those who would rather converse.

4. Have realistic expectations. How many families are super-close and free of conflict? Few to none. So encourage those who will listen, including kids and teens, to treat guests with respect. We don't have to be best of friends because we're related, and no one has the right to shove their opinions down the throats of other family members. Therefore...

5. ... Cool your temper. Accept in advance that Aunt Maggie will likely bring up her fringe political views. Yes, it always makes your hackles rise. So what? Relax and breathe. If debating politics with the family stresses you out, don't get sucked in. Afterwards, use it as a learning experience: take the chance to chat with your older kids about making polite conversation with others, explaining that it's all about consideration for others.